What Hurts the Most

I had every intention of posting a witty rant here today about a recent grocery store find, but after the day I've had, I'm saving the witty rant for another day.

There are so many things that I love about being a full-time mom. I love being there to witness most of the firsts in my kids lives. I love taking them to museums and play dates. I love sitting and watching cartoons and reading books. I love singing Disney Princess songs in the car with them. But don't get me wrong. There are plenty of times that I'm tired and over it and just want some quiet time by myself.

Today, I had the kids by myself from sun-up to sun-down and it seemed that the fates were working against me the whole day. During music camp in the morning, Big A drew a picture of an octopus family. It had a little sister, a big sister and a daddy. No mommy. When I asked her where the mommy was, she told me that the mommy was too big and wouldn't fit in the picture. (I have always been scared to death of my kids perceptions of my status as overweight & her comment has me seriously concerned.) Strike 1.

At lunch, Big A announced that she wished I could go to work all the time so that Daddy could stay home with them, because I don't work. ??? Strike 2.

And then the one that hit it out of the park arrived at bedtime this evening. After a very busy day of camps, crafts and all kinds of fun, Big A asked me to read her a book at bedtime. I had already read 6 books to the girls and was just not in the mood to read anymore. I promised that I would read her the book tomorrow, at which point she whined and said "I wish Daddy would be here to take care of us instead of you." Strike 3. I'm out.

Sometimes I seriously question the decision for me to be at home full-time. I gave up a great career that was really going places and could possibly have us in a better situation than we're currently in. I know that being a full-time mom is a privilege and it's one that I try desperately not to take advantage of, but when I'm hit with comments like that, it makes this a really hard pill to swallow.