1 Shade of Gray

I've said for years that vanity isn't really my thing.  I don't wear makeup.  I don't use hair styling products or tools.  Most of my clothes are between 3-7 yrs old and came from Target or Old Navy.  I'm just not very concerned about being stylish.  Or at least that's what I thought.

I'm coming up on my 37th birthday next month and I'm a little distressed that with each passing day, as I look in the mirror, I seem to spot just one more gray hair on my head.  And while the first few didn't bother me too much, I'm now officially REALLY bothered.  And I can't decide if I'm more bothered by the gray hairs themselves or the fact that they are making me feel old all of a sudden.

I take it as a sign that I received a Living Social deal today for a cut, color & style from a local salon that I've been wanting to try for quite a while.  And so, I'll call tomorrow and schedule the appointment that will officially segregate my life into 2 distinct time periods:

Angie B.C. - Before Coloring
Angie A.D.J. - After the Dye Job

The Sunday Skinny

It has been a TOUGH week.  If you look up the term "stress eater" in the dictionary, you will see my picture with a blue ribbon because I was the champ this week!  Here's a sample of some of the things that were eating me, causing me to eat everything in sight.

1. My house (and everyone in it) had to be treated for head lice.

2. My microwave has been out of commission for 11 days now and looks to be down for at least another 7 days thanks to the perpetually crappy service that Best Buy provides.  Have I mentioned recently just how much I despise Best Buy?  And just how much I use my microwave on a daily basis?

3. My youngest child was diagnosed with her 2nd UTI this month and is now awaiting further tests to determine if she'll need surgery to fix a potential kidney valve issue.  She's been vomiting up her antibiotics and running a fever that is worrying to me.

4. Thanks to a lot of unexpected expenses (and lack of work hours available), I'm afraid we're not going to be able to pay for our big Disney vacation payment that's due next month.  (And yes, I realize that this is a "first world problem".  It still sucks.)

5. Aunt Flo decided to visit early this month.  That bitch.

I wish that was everything going on, but sadly, it's not.

This week just has to be a better week and I have to figure out a way to manage my stress that doesn't involve my eating habits.  So, let's try this again.  My goals for this week are:

1. No more than 3 carbonated drinks this week.
2. Exercise at least 3 mornings this week.
3. Try to eat at least 1 serving of fruit every day this week.

I'm hoping for a much more upbeat and positive report next Sunday!

Ten on Ten: July 2012

This is my first time participating in 10 on 10, hosted by a bit of sunshine.  The project is to take a picture an hour, for 10 consecutive hours on the 10th of the month.  Here's my day in pictures.

Getting ready for my morning workout

Arriving home as the sun begins to peek through the trees

These girls are ready to go to camp!

Doing a little paper shuffling at the office

Maleficent is so demanding!

Packing up for the day's later activities

Sully, my buddy

Lunch with friends is always tastier

The storm clouds are about to open up

My happy campers!

Shortcomings

As the mom of 2 girls who are pretty close in age, I find myself struggling with the balance of building up their self-esteem but understanding that failure is a part of growing as a person.  I want them to know how proud I am of all their achievements.  I want them to know that as long as they choose a path in life that makes them happy, I will always be proud of them.  I want them to know that I love each of them equally, for different reasons, and strive to never hold one of them to a higher standard than the other.  I hope that they never look back on their childhood and feel like they disappointed me with any kind of regularity.  

I say all of this because as an adult, I struggle heavily with feeling like a failure at most things, especially when it comes to anything having to do with my parents.  My childhood, while it had many good things, had more than its fair share of moments when I was made to feel like I was a huge disappointment to my parents.  Much of it had to do with my younger brother being put on a pedestal and treated with what seemed like a complete different set of standards.  Some of it was brought on by my own stupid adolescent decisions in certain situations, but it seemed like there was a huge amount of pressure put on me from an early age to reach a certain standard.  And not reaching that standard resulted in yelling, belittling and taking away things that were given to me as gifts because I didn’t perform as expected.

I can remember taking tours of Ivy League college campuses from the age of 13.  Yet when it came time to tour colleges that I was actually interested in (and could possibly gain admission to), it appeared more of a bother to my parents.  A let down.  I’ve often felt that no matter what I accomplish in my life, it will never be the standard that my parents expected of me.  And this feeling is perpetuated when I hear my parents bragging about how proud they are of my brother and his graduating from an expensive name-brand university and his powerful career and the fact that my father is parading him around to his business colleagues because “this kid is going somewhere”.

I’m really hoping that this feeling dissipates over time because it really sucks that I can’t even make it through a family dinner without spending an hour crying in the bathroom over my father criticizing my choice of dinner venues.  Those are some deep-seeded issues.  And I’m sick of feeling this way.

The Sunday Skinny

I've been a major slacker with my weight loss posts over the last 2 months.  Ok, maybe 3 months.  The good news is that I'm in the same size clothes that I was in during my last post.  The bad news is that the good news is simply miraculous because I've fallen into some old (i.e. horrible) eating habits and my exercise level isn't where it needs to be.  So, I'm getting back on the blogging bandwagon to hopefully give me some accountability.  However, I'm changing things up just a bit.

In an effort to avoid becoming even more obsessive about the number on the scale, I'm taking a break from recording my weight.  I've felt for quite a while that if my clothing size continues to move down, then I'm happy.  I keep reminding myself that last summer, I was wearing a size 20 shorts.  This summer I'm wearing a size 14.  That's fabulous!

So, my goals for this week are:

1. Work out 3 mornings

2. Don't drink more than 2 carbonated drinks

3. Make a conscious effort to eat healthy snacks instead of junk food

My new hobby is a winner

I've been an absent blogger here lately.  I wish I could say it's because I've been overwhelmingly busy, but that's not the case.  I have been doing stuff, but I'm the type of person that if I don't have a million things on my plate, then my productivity comes to a screeching halt.  I found a couple of summer jobs (thank goodness) and I've tried to keep busy with the kids, but alas, I have spent a LOT of time clearing stuff off the DVR and taking up a new hobby.

My friend Kat's husband is an avid online sweepstakes player.  He enters lots of sweeps and he wins some great prizes.  Inspired by his success, I decided to get my feet wet and see what kind of luck I would have with the world of online sweeps.  My ultimate goal is to win a Disney vacation for my family, so I enter all of those sweeps that I can find, but I'm now entering lots of smaller blog hosted sweeps that offer some great prizes too.  I can't tell you how excited I was when I got an email the day after I started entering sweeps that said I was a winner!

Tara from A Spectacled Owl, was hosting a giveaway of adorable hand made owl items from Sabrina at Daisy Dew and Tutu and the package arrived yesterday!  My many thanks to Tara for hosting the giveaway and to Sabrina for making the most adorable owl items I have ever seen!  My 7 yr old has been wearing the necklace nonstop and she put the keychain on her brand new backpack.  (She's excited about her friends seeing her new bling at school next month!)  My 6 yr old almost cried when I gave her the bow holder and new hairbow.  All of the items are beautifully made!

So, stay tuned to see the news about my other win that I found out about this week.  I'm waiting for the items to be in hand before I blog about them.

Do you enter online sweepstakes?  Have you won any prizes that you were really excited about?